"Men, you know you're desperate for sex if..."
1) You're making out with a chick, she unzips your pants and she discovers you're already wearing a condom.
2) You decide to do "cybersex" with complete strangers in an on-line chat room (uh, it's NOT actually sex... it's "typing", dammit!).
3) You're about to have sex with a chick and you CAN'T find any condoms around your house or apartment, so you settle for Saran Wrap.
4) You auction off your virginity over the Internet in an on-line auction. The winning bidder turns out to be a 68 year-old Ukranian woman (in a wheelchair) who has the winning bid of $1.50. You decide to put out anyways.
5) ALL your Twitter and Facebook friends are pornstars and you constantly pester them to star in your own homemade adult film.
6) You find yourself leering at the freshly baked apple pies at the bakery shop (yes, that's an "American Pie" joke).
7) You're STILL willing to have sex with the drunken chick who threw up her dinner on you.
8) You're willing to bang the psycho chick who has been stalking you the last 6 months.
9) ALL of the female pen pals that you write to are convicted felons (who are doing 10 to 20 years in a maximum prison). You have their scheduled "conjugal visits" circled on your calendar.
10) You start your own adult film production company just so you have a steady flow of hot chicks.
Monday, April 26, 2010
Bye Bye Floppy
Story shown originally on Talknerdytomelover.com
Sony announced today that they would end shipments of 3.5" floppy disks in Japan in March of 2011, two years after ending worldwide shipments of what was once the most ubiquitous storage media on the planet.
If you went to school in the '80s or '90s, you remember carrying these stupid plastic squares around, flicking the little metal cover back and forth even though your teachers told you that would ruin the disk. And you remember using whatever utilities you could on your computer to somehow get that 2 MB file (it's HUGE!) to either fit on one of these 1.44 MB "high" density disks or span multiples of them.
The floppy's death spiral began in 1998, when Apple introduced the floppy-less iMac, while CD burners began to become widely available. I think the last time I used one was in 2004, when I needed to pull an old college paper off a floppy. I had to dig a USB floppy drive out of storage just to do that, since I got rid of my last computer with a built-in floppy drive in 2002.
So, with the floppy all-but-dead and buried, let's take a look back at some fun floppy facts:
- The 3.5" floppy disk was originally released by HP in 1982 and held 264 kB of data.
- The common 3.5" HD floppy disk was released in 1987, and had nearly completely replaced its 5.25" predecessor within 3 years.
- As larger storage media became popular, there were multiple attempts to extend the life of the floppy drive, including the LS-120 "SuperDisk" (God, remember that thing?)
- A pack of 40 3.5" floppy disks will cost you $24.99 at Amazon.com. That gets you about 58 MB of storage. For the same price, you can get an 8 GB flash drive from Amazon.com. That's nearly a 14000% increase in storage.
- A dual-layer Blu-ray Disc can hold 100 GB of information, or the equivalent of 69,444 floppy disks.
Sony announced today that they would end shipments of 3.5" floppy disks in Japan in March of 2011, two years after ending worldwide shipments of what was once the most ubiquitous storage media on the planet.
If you went to school in the '80s or '90s, you remember carrying these stupid plastic squares around, flicking the little metal cover back and forth even though your teachers told you that would ruin the disk. And you remember using whatever utilities you could on your computer to somehow get that 2 MB file (it's HUGE!) to either fit on one of these 1.44 MB "high" density disks or span multiples of them.
The floppy's death spiral began in 1998, when Apple introduced the floppy-less iMac, while CD burners began to become widely available. I think the last time I used one was in 2004, when I needed to pull an old college paper off a floppy. I had to dig a USB floppy drive out of storage just to do that, since I got rid of my last computer with a built-in floppy drive in 2002.
So, with the floppy all-but-dead and buried, let's take a look back at some fun floppy facts:
- The 3.5" floppy disk was originally released by HP in 1982 and held 264 kB of data.
- The common 3.5" HD floppy disk was released in 1987, and had nearly completely replaced its 5.25" predecessor within 3 years.
- As larger storage media became popular, there were multiple attempts to extend the life of the floppy drive, including the LS-120 "SuperDisk" (God, remember that thing?)
- A pack of 40 3.5" floppy disks will cost you $24.99 at Amazon.com. That gets you about 58 MB of storage. For the same price, you can get an 8 GB flash drive from Amazon.com. That's nearly a 14000% increase in storage.
- A dual-layer Blu-ray Disc can hold 100 GB of information, or the equivalent of 69,444 floppy disks.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Use Their Weapons
Just Awesome!!! Fianlly the Finally we all been waiting 4
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
April Showers
Hello blogger's and reader,
Well haven't written in a while but blogging lost its luster. Like almost everything I do in my life, I get into something then I just stop. Here is an update on what I'm in to now but possibly giving up in couple weeks...(BTW I stopped going to gym six days after I last blogged about the elliptical)I am trying to eat 5 to 6 times a day to increase my metabolism... so far I feel like nothing happening but maybe its my NY mentality that I want it to happen NOW!! But I got to be patient. Any way nothing really has pissed me off lately other then myself and all i do is fight with myself. Eventually I will have something else that bothers me and trust me you ill hear about it.
Till then
Ciao!
-Malo
PS Depending on how they treat my father I might b bitching about a certain Health insurance company....Mwahahahahaha
Well haven't written in a while but blogging lost its luster. Like almost everything I do in my life, I get into something then I just stop. Here is an update on what I'm in to now but possibly giving up in couple weeks...(BTW I stopped going to gym six days after I last blogged about the elliptical)I am trying to eat 5 to 6 times a day to increase my metabolism... so far I feel like nothing happening but maybe its my NY mentality that I want it to happen NOW!! But I got to be patient. Any way nothing really has pissed me off lately other then myself and all i do is fight with myself. Eventually I will have something else that bothers me and trust me you ill hear about it.
Till then
Ciao!
-Malo
PS Depending on how they treat my father I might b bitching about a certain Health insurance company....Mwahahahahaha
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Why do i hate myself?
Today while I was on the elliptical at the gym, when all of a sudden something hit me… WHY was I on the elliptical!!! I clearly hated every pain staking minute on the damn thing and wasn’t having any fun, but for some odd reason I go every other day and spend 40 minutes on a machine that laughs at me when I get on and continues to laugh till I’m gone and out of sight… Kind of like the scale… and my girl when she watches me do anything I call athletic : ( . So while ellipticalling dwelling on it, I realized I was doing it to get skinny, I’m sick of every time I take my shirt off at the beach the guys from “Whale Wars” show up to stop others from laughing at me (they’re so embarrassing). Be perfect like an ambrocrombie model or fit in any of there clothing without having to go online because the sizes they have at the stores say “not for your fat ass”. I digress, I just want a clear answer on, is it society pushing us to be more to there liking or is just the self hating me that pushes me to do it. Now I do think its society but at the same time I understand that I have free will and that at any moment I can say no to 12 beers with the 50 hot wings on 10 cent wing nights (Mmmmmm). I’m not going to sue corona for giving me a beer belly and not putting there nutrition facts on the bottle that’s stupid I know beer is bad for me (c’mon if you don’t, someone should throw you screaming from an airplane while having a pine cone shoved up your ass). But at the same time it’s forced on us by commercials and hot babes that snicker at us when we take our shirts off at the beach. Just today I found out that the government is planning to tax regular soda and juice drinks… now I’m all for being healthy and my self hating self hasn’t had a regular soda in like 3 yrs (water for this husky man) but seriously let us decide our fate… we have the ability to make a decision, whether it’s the right one is in the eye of the beholder. But what’s next beer tax, hooker tax or, bottom shelf alcohol tax. Rule of nature is “only the strong survive”, so let the m*tha f*cka that wants to die of over eating at McDonalds die a happy man with no extra tax (but shoot the m*tha F*cka that sues them for making him fat and tax him). Not letting anyone make a health decision for themselves, for what? So that people may live longer? That’s Dumb, not to include the fact that when I’m eligible for social security I’m not getting a cent. So why live longer? Old, broke and, miserable? or young and having fun? its our choice not the governments (That’s the way I see it)
With that I leave you with something one of my favorite comedians said “Gabriel don’t you want to live for a long time….. NOT IF I CANT EAT TACO’S” –Gabriel Iglesias
By the way I am self hating, so I know it was me pushing me on the elliptical...
Society just helps.
With that I leave you with something one of my favorite comedians said “Gabriel don’t you want to live for a long time….. NOT IF I CANT EAT TACO’S” –Gabriel Iglesias
By the way I am self hating, so I know it was me pushing me on the elliptical...
Society just helps.
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